Travis Panasiuk

Travis.
The news about Travis reached me out here in China too. The distance dulls the shock a little, making it seem less real; hard for me to comprehend. Hearing about something like this purely through email doesn’t work the same. I almost don't really believe it. Or I don’t want to believe it, but I know he's gone and it hurts. He pretty much just started Kung-Fu, not even at the best parts yet, and now he's done. I liked training with him because even though he was a relative beginner, he wasn’t afraid to try things. Being afraid is a huge hindrance to experience and the experience that Travis gained was huge. I know that a lot of people gained from seeing that exhibited as well. You can’t help but be influenced by that kind of an attitude; it’s infectious at the very least. Training with him was fun because I could see that smile going strong even when he was tired and even if I was kicking him too hard. He didn’t seem to really think about being tired or sore, but more just enjoyed being there and that can cut out pain like nothing. His passing reminds me that life is precious, every second of it. I think he understood that very well. I barely knew the guy outside of Silent River, though I had hung out with him a couple times. He came to my going away party and he’s luckily one of those people that can go to a party where they know very few people, be sober and still have a good time. He was a great guy to know, though I knew him so little. Never really got the chance. No, I had the chance, maybe if I hung out with him more earlier on. But the road of “If” leads to madness and regrets would be something that a guy like Travis wouldn’t appreciate. A better idea is to instead learn from that and don’t delay in doing something. Invite that interesting, new person out for a drink, learn that instrument, try that game, eat that odd dish. Everything is new in the beginning, so don’t be afraid to do something new. Approach it without fear but with a lust for gaining experience, for knowledge. Almost no one looks back and says, “I wish I hadn’t tried that.” But I’ve heard a lot of people say that they wish they had. This is a piece of Travis that I’ll try to keep in me forever. I feel bad that I cannot attend the funeral as I’m in China currently. I’ll have to pay tribute to his life in a different way out here. It may not sound like much, but I’ll keep him in mind while I train and try and emulate his frame of mind and attack my training with the same vigour that he did.
Jonathan Robinson

China Journal 2008-09-17, 11:11PM

Early this morning we, Hunter, Rolf, Tyler and I, went to get our physical examinations done. Sadly we had to miss training to do it. Of course, Rolf and I messed up our alarm clocks and we were rushing, unshowered, out the door. We hop on the subway and transfer to a bus until we jump out onto some street. After a short walk we’re there at the hospital. I was always wondering what a hospital in China would be like. I hear so many horror stories about China that I had no idea what to expect. The first thing I see is a sign that says “physical examination for Aliens” with a nice, sharp arrow pointing around the corner towards the back. I’ll admit I was simultaneously amused and worried. After some bad E.T based jokes we went inside and I was greeted by a site that relaxed me completely; automatic, sliding, glass doors. These shiny, clean doors just put my heart at ease and we strolled in to be poked and prodded. The place was dead empty. We sat down and filled out our paperwork and when we got back to the line the place was packed. After waiting a half hour to get the papers verified, we went shuffling around to the various rooms to get examined. The first room and, oddly enough, the worst was the x-ray room. I walk in and this pushy lady almost shoves me into position. I end up with my chin in a groove on some kind of suspended plate shaped like a torso. She grabs a lead flap in the shape of a giant, 2D pair of tighty-whiteys and makes me hold it with my arms still by my sides. After bending me to her will, I look like an uncomfortable chicken. I left feeling violated and gave a blood sample with relief. Pins are nothing compared to that evil woman. I ran into my friend Chris there as well. Funny chance because he’s studying in Beijing too. We’ll meet up for lunch or something sometime.
Tried some weird kind of Chinese breakfast crape thingy. It was ok. That’s all on that.
In Chinese class today I slept during one of the breaks. It was a really odd thing I did and I’ll tell you about it in a second. First, let me say that I don’t usually sleep in class but I was really tired and I think I have a cold today. So I’m falling asleep and starting to dream and Tyler asks if I want his peach. I, in my insane, dozing state, do not think I am being offered a peach but something else, what I can’t remember, and I tell him “No” with a lot of attitude mixed in. He offers again, knowing that I do want the peach. I tell him no again. He offers one more time saying, “Jon! Do you want to eat this peach?” I clue in and grab it and eat it. I don’t thank him until later. I’m out of it. I get up to put the pit in the garbage but instead trip and fall. I’m really in a stupor at this point. I crawl over to the garbage, put it in and roll over onto the floor again. Martin almost tripped on me. Sorry for you literary types reading this and hating my grammar but I’m really tired.
Oh, one more thing. Yesterday Tyler and I tried a new noodle place. They were fantastic. For about two bucks Canadian we enjoyed huge bowls of noodles with beef chunks! I slurped mine back, as slurping is polite in China, and at the end I found a little tiny, approximately one point five cm, cockroach type bug floating dead in my broth. I picked it out with my chopsticks and put it on the table, as the Chinese do for anything that they don’t want to eat, and I have a quick mental debate. On the one hand the noodles were delicious, on the other there was a freaking cockroach in it. As always, logic prevails! I didn’t die from the bug and the noodles were grrreat! I decide to finish my pasta. We took Rolf there today and enjoyed the same dish. MMMMMmmmmmmmmmm Noodles!

China Journal 2008-09-11, 3:27PM

The first day of training was yesterday. Just so you know what we did and how it seems to work, I’ll tell you. To start, we start at nine and go until about eleven thirty. We get a ten minute break about halfway through and the only other breaks are the slow jogs around the training hall between exercises. We never really stop moving for the two point five hours. Warm-up, like in Silent River, is the most strenuous part so far. We do a lot of things with jumping, foot work and really odd exercises that are really painful. Quick stepping and a lot of hip movement. There are a couple where it looks like I’m skipping through a field of daisies or trying to shimmy out of a pair of shorts without my hands, but they help in warming up and working the core. For warm-up we also play soccer, aka 足球. It was me, Rolf, Tyler and another guy, none of us being pro in soccer, versus the three instructors and a russian guy who seems to play often. The final score was something like twelve to one against us. After that we split up between the three instructors. Rolf, Tyler, Sasha the Russian guy, and I study Sanda (Chinese kickboxing) on the far left mat. A short, quick and acrobatic Indian guy studies Wushu (the flying stuff) on the middle mat. And a crazy Danish guy studies Taichi (slow and relaxing) on the far right mat. Our instructor is in his forties, the oldest one of the three, and agile for a guy his age by western standards. At one point, while we were doing fifty slow side kicks, I saw him pop up into a straight and steady handstand. He’s funny too and patient with the language barrier. He knows a little English but luckily he speaks mostly Chinese, giving us a good chance to learn more. Oh, side note, we train in tiny kickboxing shorts so I show a lot of leg during practice. Sorry for the mental picture, but you have to know. When we get into the actual Sanda the first thing we do is stand in a fighting stance for ten minutes in left then right lead. After that we practice proper punching technique by punching slowly then quickly, one hundred times, both sides. There is a lot of repetition, I find, which is good. We pared up and did some blocking practice with one guy throwing punches and the other blocking and parrying. At one point he got us to put our hands behind our backs with our partner punching us all over, body, face, and we were told to look at him and not blink. Also, a lot of stretching. And running and jogging and walking around. We did some pad work too, kicking and punching them. The teaching style is different too. because communication is tricky he’ll just walk up and move your hand or leg, or show exactly what to do. An eye for detail is handy here, I’m definitely practicing mine. Also, I’m sore and, what with more than two hours formal training every weekday morning, I expect to be sore for a while. I also will be practicing some extra stuff for fun. I bought a meteor hammer so I have to learn how to use it.

Chinese language class started as well. It’s at two in the afternoon for two hours on Monday and Friday and three on Wednesday. It’s very good. We actively engage in conversation with the teacher and each other all class. I think Wed is the conversation class. Writing is on Fri or Mon. It is even better because we have only three people in our class. Tyler, Martin and I. Rolf is with the crazy Danish guy in a lower class. Class here will serve as a good complement to my practical practice that I constantly have just living here and that seems to me to be the best way to learn a language.

It’s really interesting being a foreigner. I notice people always look at me and some full on stare. The Chinese students at school are extra friendly and just last night Rolf and I played with what we like to call a bird-ball. (a birdie type thing that’s used like a hackie sack. Young and old people alike play with it. it’s a traditional Chinese toy. It’s made of four feathers on a rubber base that has some small aluminum washer-sized rings to make a pleasing noise when you kick it.) We were soon joined by two girls and a guy. We tried to talk to them and one of them knew a little English so, after playing bird-ball for about forty-five minutes, him, Rolf and I sat down and talked about Beijing and whatever else came to mind. Friends are easy to come by here it seems. Also, last night while roaming the market for food, four of us, Canada, Amsterdam, Norway and America, were standing and talking when a young kid ran right up to us and just stared at us with a large smile! Chinese kids are cute. I want one. I probably won’t marry a Chinese woman though, or father random half-Chinese children though. I’ll just get a Chinese kid and take him home in my luggage or something. Or maybe not…

China Journal 2008-09-09, 10:50Pm

Finally ate after all that! Noodles. Good. Best thing about Chinese noodle eating is that you don’t actually twist the noodles, like we do, around the fork. Instead you slurp like a vacuum in a puddle. It’s awesome! All my manners from home are now forgotten and replaced with slurping, grabbing food from other people’s plates and putting my elbows on the table. Burping is fine too.. I assume… ha! After a bit of a break we took a half hour bus ride to a kung fu store. Weapons everywhere. EVERYWHERE!! I have pictures. Go look at them. I bought some good stuff too. Rolf got crazy metal claw gloves with spikes! We were like kids in a candy store! We were allowed to pick up and play with everything so, of course, we did. there was a sword almost as tall as me! I wanted to buy everything so I may go back and buy more someday. I bought a meteor hammer and will learn it. After getting back from the store Rolf, Tyler and I went for food at an awesome place only a short subway ride away. They had something called princess made milk bun or something like that. I need the recipe. It was the best thing ever. EVER!! It was sweet but not strong sweet. I can’t even describe it. best thing ever. EVER! EVER! I will eat it again. also, vinegar looks like soya sauce. I made my rice taste crappy. It made me sad. The buns made me happy though!! We ran back through the rain. Turns out I love running in the rain. I am tired. I’ll respond to emails tomorrow after training! Night night.

China Journal 2008-09-09, 10:54AM

Wow. Just spent all day since eight looking for some hospital to get a physical. All foreigners need it supposedly. But this means that we couldn’t eat all morning so we’re starving! 饿死了Uh si le. Literally starving to death. Soon we eat because the place we went doesn’t do it anymore and we could not find the other place. Kind of annoying but whatever. Tomorrow we start kung fu and Chinese language!! I can’t wait! Booyah!

China Journal 2008-09-09, 12:12AM

Wow long day. To start, I had the first good sleep of the trip so I feel rested. Sadly, Rolf and I slacked off for a good chunk of the day. We went for breakfast sandwiches and a cookie then lounged in the room all day until early afternoon when we decided to go on an adventure. We almost immediately ran into Eda, Hunter and the new guy, Tyler. He’s a pretty good guy so far, funny and easy-going so he fits right in. he’s here studying Sanda and Chinese language from Ohio. After waiting an hour for him and Hunter to figure out the phone for overseas calls we all went to a crazy street with all sorts of stuff to buy and haggle for! It was sweet because I figured out the secret to haggling. Pretend that the merchandize is a piece of crap that you don’t even want and say no at least five times and then start to walk away and they’ll drop the price at least by half, more if you work it. Rolf got a thing priced at five hundred yuan dropped to one hundred yuan so he bought it. Some kung fu clothes. Lots of neat stuff there; I’ll be returning with some money to buy some stuff. Presents! I saw the infamous scorpion shish kebob as well and will be eating it. More on that later. Wow are the people selling things pushy. Taking the subway was bloody long! Transferred three times and probably rode and walked for half an hour to get to where we were going. It was fun though. We ended up racing through the stations on the way back. Eda’s crazy and at one point tried to sneakily beat us to the top of a huge set of stairs and escalators. That started a race that made us all super sweaty by the time we got to the subway. We were all rushing by people who were content to slowly ride up and jumping over railings and sprinting up dozens of steps. Good fun! On the last stop Rolf went back to keep the door open while me an Tyler went to check emails. I took the trusting country boy into some dark alleys. These dark alleys, luckily, contained no thugs so the short-cut worked! And for my parent’s sake I will point out that the alleys were not shifty, merely poorly lit. after more awkward conversation we finally got on some computers. After getting back to the apartments I needed to alert Rolf to our return and open the doors. I shouted up to the windows but of course he didn’t hear me. it was open so I decided to throw my hackie-sack in. I missed and it fell into a bamboo patch. I’ll find it tomorrow I hope. Sadly the door was actually still open at this time and we had no problem getting in. turns out that I’m dumb when tired. Turns out. A few things that I’ve noticed: guys have no problem carrying a girl’s purse without feeling like wussies and even wear them over their shoulders. People in dark back alleys sound even shiftier when you don’t know what they’re saying. Tea is awesome. We drank some tea just now actually. Bed time! I have some kind of physical tomorrow it turns out…

China Journal 2008-09-07, 11:23PM

Turns out we weren’t going to see birds, but the bird’s nest, aka the Olympic stadium. Haha! It was really spectacular. I’ve never seen a building with no sharp edges before, it’s rounded out all over! Also, I found a toy that I need to buy. It’s this large birdie type thingy that they use like a hacky-sack! So fun and I impressed a few of them with some tricks from my years hackie-sacking. Must buy toy. Also had more delicious food! I like food. It’s such good food here too. Eda and her friend who’s name I forget showed me and Rolf a sweet bar filled with foreigners. I’ll probably drop in there when I feel the need to have a good, English conversation. Oh right, we rode the subway for this little expedition today. It’s so high tech and it goes everywhere! It puts Edmonton’s to shame. Their transit compared to Edmonton’s is like an Olympian to a retarded cripple. Bed time. I hope I can sleep this time.

China Journal 2008-09-07, 6:28PM

Good day so far! After a crappy sleep, woke up at least twenty times, I got up and Rolf and I went to the internet café. Also bought a keychain. Hey, the keychain is a big thing for me! I’ve been planning on buying one for two days now. We came back and wasted time for a while. We got hungry ( 饿了Uh le) 安定bought some noodles and found hot water. With this newly acquired boiling water we had big plans for tea. After killing more time I found myself falling asleep so we went to market. On the way a friendly yet pushy girl tried to sell us make-up and something about our feet.. it was hard to understand her because she spoke excellent Chinese. We spent a good forty-five minutes buying noodles and snacks along with some tea and, very important, toilet paper. Also bought a knife for the watermelon we purchased on the side of the road on the way back. Delicious, by the way. This may sound boring to you but there is actually so much going on that I can’t really describe it all. Everything is different. Here, I’ll try a bit. People walk in the middle of the road and drivers honk to get through when off the main road-ways. There is garbage all over. It doesn’t seem like anyone worries about littering. I saw a window level with the ground that had broken glass spread in front of it for security. It turns out I suck at haggling. I paid full price, 14 yuan, for a watermelon. That’s a bit over two bucks. I’ll think of more later. Eda’s going to be by soon to take us to a park to see birds or something.

China Journal 2008-09-07, 3:35AM

Jet lag again, I think. Either that or I just can’t sleep. That’s ok though, this gives me a chance to write about the day’s events. I got up at about seven this morning after not having much sleep and finally being fed up with not being able to sleep and I unpacked a bit of my stuff. I had a shower too. The shower is a little different than at home. Instead of being in a little stall or behind a curtain, it’s just there on the wall of the bathroom. There’s a drain on the floor of the bathroom and it just drains down. I can brush my teeth and shower, even poo and shower if I want because the water easily reaches the toilet! I met up with Hunter at about ten am. We hung out and talked about random stuff until Summer and Esmeralda, Eda for short, arrived from the airport with my roommate. His name’s Rolf. He’s from Norway. A student of martial arts since he was 13 (he’s 20 now) and seems like a decent guy so far. We’re probably going to swing by an internet café tomorrow and send some emails because our room internet is unavailable until the tenth. Food was the first stop after dropping off his baggage. I ordered 25 dumplings, aka jiaozi, and tried the spicy sauce. It hurt. I stuck to the other sauce. I tried my first bit of conversation with a stranger as asked for a box to take the leftovers in as my eyes were bigger than my stomach. I walked up. “Qing gei wo yi ge he.” “Mei you he” was the response I got. Luckily I only had to think about it for a few seconds until I realized he said that he had no boxes. I didn’t know what to say. No box? My plan is ruined and Plan B doesn’t exist! Oh no! I was about to panic and run away when he gave me a little baggie. I thanked him with a “xie xie” and sat back down to bag my jiaozi. I stored them in the community fridge and we started the tour. Listening to our Chinese friends talk I am happy to find out that I understand some words and phrases. Not nearly enough to engage in any good conversation but enough to leave me in high spirits for the semester. I saw a bunch of buildings where para-olympic training is happening. Neat! Library, classrooms, training hall and, best of all, cafeteria, are in short walking distance. We left the campus and walked down some nearby streets. Food everywhere, cheap goods too. I found a super comfy pair of sandals for only 6 yuan, about one buck, but sadly the biggest size they had was 45 and I’m about a 46-47… darn my gargantuan size! Rolf got a pair and they are supposedly great. Jerk. Just kidding, he’s not bad. We split the cost of a big jug of water and a manual pump to jam in the top. we watched some children’s cartoon in Chinese, which are hilarious by the way, and went to bed at about eight. Bad idea, because I’m awake. Neat thunderstorm though! I’m going to bed again, wish me luck.

China Journal 2008-09-06, 1:39AM

Darn Jet Lag. I had a dream though. I was in my house with this kid. I was being mean to him in a funny way, funny to me anyway. Basically I kept beating him at anything that he tried to be better than me at. At one point I finally said, “Fine, you can have the hose” during a water fight we were having. I was surprised to see him ready to use it, even in the house. I run up the stairs before he can drench me (we were in the basement), then I run out the front door, down to my basement door. As I’m running outside, I remember looking at the trees behind my house with a paranoid glance, thinking something might come out at me. I was hesitant to turn my back on them. I run across the basement until I’m almost behind the kid and I slam the water valve off. He makes a defeated grunt and throws the hose on the floor. I pick up the hose and use the last bit of water pressure to drench him, telling him that there’s always some pressure left after you shut it off. He was pissed. Now, in the real world, I’m in a kind of crouch, typing on my computer in my undies. Just thought I’d throw in that visual, suckers. Ha!

China Journal 2008-09-05, 9:45PM

I boarded the plane from Edmonton after I ate a delicious breakfast with my parents. Everything went smoothly, I was genuinely surprised. The flight from Edmonton to Vancouver was less that eventful. I played some pokemon to pass the time. Upon arriving in Van, I rushed out of the plane and down the many hallways, following the sign for international travel. I turned left at least sixteen times which should be impossible without going in circles but that’s Vancouver airport, I guess. I found my gate easily, checked in easily and then went for a rum and spinach dip. Tasty. I board my plane. The flight across the ocean was long. Really long. I literally did not stand up once until I was in china. That’s about 11+ hours of sitting. I played a lot of pokemon and read a book and slept for about 2 hours. Boring boring boring shoot me it was boring. I lived. I walked with my new friend Rachael to customs. We were friends because we both are English speakers and therefore could actually converse. I grabbed my bag off the spinny bag thingy and set off in search of my supposed school. I walked out of the baggage claim into a sea of signs for people. I was starting to think I’d fallen for an internet scam when I saw that the biggest sign was for me!! Hazah! I was greated warmly by Summer and Esmeralda. We grabbed a cab and went to the campus I’m staying and learning at. Turns out, it’s an Olympic training ground too! We met up with Hunter, an outgoing and friendly guy. I was shown my room, which is a basic bed, shower, toilet and internet access and then we ate some food. Mmm food. After eating and a couple drinks and some good conversation, they left me to my own devices and I’ll be getting a tour tomorrow! Sleepy. The next one will be better, I’m tired. Oh right, the air is clean because of the Olympics . Quite breathable, so far.